Looks Like We're On Different Sides of the Fence Here
by Self-Inflicted Insanity
Summary: Three different AU takes on Cable & Deadpool #31, where Cable tries to convince Deadpool to switch from the pro-superhuman-registration side to the rebel, anti-superhuman-registration side. The first chapter is fluffy, the second chapter is angsty, and the third chapter is angsty, one-sided Cablepool.
1. Come to the Rebel Side

**AN: These 3 chapters are all different AUs taking place in _Cable & Deadpool #31, _****where Cable tries to convince Deadpool to switch from the pro-superhuman-registration side to the rebel, anti-superhuman-registration side.**

 _I wrote this first AU for my sister, and it's super fluffy :3_

* * *

 **Come to the Rebel Side (we have bigger, better badges)**

_**Oh, this is SO MUCH FUN!** _ Deadpool thinks as he fires tranquilizer darts at Captain America again, and the good ol' Cap'n blocks them with his mighty red-white-and-blue shield of freedom and rescued kittens.

"Hercules can hit him a few times," comes an oh-too-familiar voice, calm and self-assured as $%^&. "Deadpool has a healing factor."

As if they all didn't already know that.

"He'll recover. Eventually," Cable, aka Nathan Dayspring Askansi'son Gesundheit, says, stepping out into the room all glowing blue—no seriously, his left eye flashing blue, and a blue aura around him. _Way to make a dramatic appearance, Nate. Just like always._

Soldier from the future here to save the world from its own— _and his own—_ _ **insanity.**_

 _And currently here to save me from mine,_ Deadpool thinks, and rather bitterly. _Or so he believes. The #$ &%$. _

"Looks like we're on different sides of the fence here," Nate says, approaching Deadpool with sure strides. Though please notice how he never once lets down his gravimetric force-field whatsit thingie. "I'll _double_ whatever the Commission on Superhuman Activities is paying you."

 **"** **My principles cannot be bought!"** Deadpool says indignantly, cuz Nate soon-to-be-sainted, Savior of the World Cable thinks that he knows Deadpool _so_ well.

"And I'll give you a bigger badge," Cable adds. He keeps his gaze steady on Deadpool, not blinking.

Okay, so maybe Cable knows Deadpool pretty well after all.

 **"** ** _Oooooh! Can't/must conflict...!"_** Deadpool drawls out, as if he's really thinking about it.

He wasn't actually going to think about. But then he really thought about it.

In the middle of lifting his gun to fire at Cable, Deadpool pauses, tilting his head as he considered Cable. **"You'll really pay me twice as much?"**

"Yes," Nate says evenly.

 _Getting paid more to be Cable's friend than to hunt down supers for the American government? Hey, why not?!_

 **"** **And you'll really get me a bigger badge?"** Deadpool prods.

"Yes," Nate says again.

 **"** **Will you make the badge big enough to cover my entire chest?"** Deadpool asks.

"Yes." The corners of Nate's lips are starting to twist up in that infuriating smirk.

 _He thinks he owns the show. Shows what he knows._ _ **I'm**_ _the one bringing in the comic sales and stealing fanpersons' hearts!_

 **"** **And the badge will say anything I want it to?"** Deadpool questions, and now he's really starting to get excited.

"Yes," Nate agrees. "As long as it's not inappropriate."

Deadpool is still pointing the tranquilizer gun at him, just in case. **"Will you have the badge read: 'DEADPOOL IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST AWESOME PERSON EVER P.S. CABLE SUCKS'?"** Deadpool says hopefully, grinning beneath the mask.

Cable blinks for a moment, surprised, before he quickly collects himself and says, "Yes, if that's what it takes."

 **"** **You're seriously willing to pay a high monetary fee and bribe with huge official shiny badges engraved with a label that degrades you in order to secure my friendship?"** Deadpool asks, somewhere between suspicious, disbelieving, and hopeful.

It seems that Cable only picked up on the last emotion, because he lets his gravimetric force-field thing drop so he's not all glowy blue anymore and smiles—and not just his usual I-know-something-you-don't smile, but a genuine, yes-I-really-mean-it-and-I-actually-enjoy-your-company smile. "Yes."

 **"** **Huh,"** Deadpool says, staring at him with narrowed eyes. **"And you're really actually going to do all those things for me?"**

"Yes, Wade," Nate says, patiently, but still smiling gently.

 **"** **And you're not going to use me to make me make a fool of myself on television to make you look better?"** Deadpool asks, doubtful.

Nate's expression drops, and he looks almost... sorry? "No, Wade," he says, tone lowering to almost a deep murmur. "I'm not going to do that."

 **"** **Okay then,"** Deadpool shrugs, dropping the gun to the ground and clapping his hands together, and the sudden loud noise makes the renegade heroes watching the scene jump, startled. **"Sign me up for the resistances force!"**

Nate practically beams.

The assembled rebel superheroes glance at each other in confusion and alarm, before looking back at the two friends (?) standing there grinning at each other, looking like maybe they want to hug it out.

 **"** **Soooo,"** Deadpool says finally, glancing around at the revel superheroes who just witnessed a very personal friendship-problem-resolution that they couldn't possibly understand, before glancing down at the cement floor of the warehouse, toeing at it with his boot, before looking back up at Nate. **"Where's my badge?"**

* * *

"And how do we know Deadpool won't change sides again if the American government gives him even _more_ money and an even _bigger_ badge?" Captain America asks Cable dubiously, as they watch Deadpool prancing around the rebel hideout showing off his large new badge to everyone.

"I can beat any offer that they make," Cable says calmly, watching Deadpool with maybe a slight hint of a smile.

Captain America turns to stare at him incredulously. "And you're really willing to _buy_ Deadpool's... _friendship?"_ He says that last word like what he actually wants to say is 'temporary alliance.'

"I'd rather have Deadpool beside me than against me," Cable says, still with that impeccably calm demeanor. "And he _is_ a friend. We just..." Cable pauses, lips thinning for a moment. "Had some misunderstandings. What you witnessed was me fixing them."

Captain America turned his attention back to Deadpool, who was skipping over to them.

 **"** **Ta-daaaaa!"** the mercenary sang, shoving the three-foot-by-three-foot badge into their faces so that the inscription: DEADPOOL IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST AWESOME PERSON EVER P.S. CABLE SUCKS, was all that they could see. **"It's official now, see?! I'm hanging this up on my wall and whipping it out whenever Nate-y gets all holier-than-thou!"**

Cable, for some reason, is smiling slightly. Captain America says skeptically, "How can you whip it out if it's hanging on your wall?"

 **"** **Hey,"** Deadpool says, narrowing his eyes and wagging a finger at the supersoldier. **"Never underestimate the powers of the unexplainable-plothole capabilities of the Marvel Universe!"**

Then he skips away to go find Daredevil and 'dare him to say that Deadpool's not the most awesome person ever now.'

"I don't get how you can stand him," Captain America says after the mercenary's out of ear-shot.

"He'll make a very valuable ally to your cause," Cable states, still almost-maybe-smiling. "Just wait and see."

* * *

 **AN: Next chapter is angsty! Cuz I like angst...**


	2. It's a Long, Lonely Road

_**AN:**_ **The same scene, except that Wade yells at Nate for being a manipulating little #$ %, and at the end, Nate is still a manipulating little #$ %.**

 _Curse words are comic-bleeped-out because... comics..._

* * *

 **It's a Long, Lonely Road You're Headin' Down (so good luck with that)**

_**Oh, this is SO MUCH FUN!**_ Deadpool thinks as he fires tranquilizer darts at Captain America again, and the good ol' Cap'n blocks them with his mighty red-white-and-blue shield of freedom and rescued kittens.

"Hercules can hit him a few times," comes an oh-too-familiar voice, calm and self-assured as $%^&. "Deadpool has a healing factor."

As if they all didn't already know that.

"He'll recover. Eventually," Cable, aka Nathan Dayspring Askansi'son Gesundheit, says, stepping out into the room all glowing blue—no seriously, his left eye flashing blue, and a blue aura around him. _Way to make a dramatic appearance, Nate. Just like always._

Soldier from the future here to save the world from its own— _and his own—_ _ **insanity.**_

 _And currently here to save me from mine,_ Deadpool thinks, and rather bitterly. _Or so he believes. The #$ &%$. _

"Looks like we're on different sides of the fence here," Nate says, approaching Deadpool with sure strides. Though please notice how he never once lets down his gravimetric force-field whatsit thingie. "I'll _double_ whatever the Commission on Superhuman Activities is paying you."

 **"** **My principles cannot be bought!"** Deadpool says indignantly, cuz Nate soon-to-be-sainted, Savior of the World Cable thinks that he knows Deadpool _so_ well.

"And I'll give you a bigger badge," Cable adds. He keeps his gaze steady on Deadpool, not blinking.

Okay, so maybe Cable knows Deadpool pretty well after all.

 **"** ** _Oooooh! Can't/must conflict...!"_** Deadpool drawls out, as if he's really thinking about it.

Then he whips out his gun (which is currently loaded with tranquilizer darts, unfortunately—regular ol' bullets would be better) and fires at Cable, even though he hasn't let down his gravimetric-whatsit-shield-whatever. See? Cable knows Deadpool _so_ well.

 **"** **NO!"** Deadpool yells as he fires, because even though it's not really doing anything, he likes the _PFFT_ sound the projectiles make as they hit Nate's forcefield, and the weapon-firing gets his anger across pretty well. **"NO! NOT EVEN MORE A BIGGER BADGE COULD I BETRAY MY** _ **UNCLE SAM!"**_

He kinda hopes Nate will actually believe he's a patriotic idiot, and that this isn't actually just all about how angry Deadpool is with _Cable._

And he doesn't want to get hit by the tranquilizer darts and fall unconscious because he and Nate _aren't done with this yet,_ and hey, maybe Cable's glowy blue pseudo-telekenesis shield doesn't encases him for the full 360 degrees, so Deadpool runs in a circle around him as he fires.

"Wade," Cable says, in that patronizing tone of his, "you're not a patriot."

 **"** **HOW DO YOU KNOW I'M NOT?!"** Deadpool demands.

"You're not even American," Cable continues calmly, letting the mercenary continue to fire bullets at him, not even turning to try and keep him within view. "You're Canadian."

 **"** **SO?!"** Deadpool demands. He runs out of bullets, so he just chucks the gun at Nate. He would have hit him right in the nose, too, if Nate didn't have the forcefield thing going on for him. "Maybe I _agree_ with the superhero registration act! I don't have a secret identity, after all!"

"I don't have a secret identity, either," Cable points out calmly, and Deadpool really wants to hit him. If only that glowing blue energy shield wasn't in the way...

"And I know you don't actually care about the Superhero Registration Act," Cable continues.

 **"** **NO, YOU** ** _DON'T_** **KNOW THAT!"** Deadpool yells, and #$^% it, when has Nate's stupid telekenitic abilities ever stopped Deadpool from trying to attack him? So he throws himself at Cable, fists flying, but he isn't even able to connect with the glowing blue barrier before it's encasing him and holding him up in the air, immobilizing him. **"MAYBE I JUST WANT TO BE ON THE THE RIGHT SIDE OF GOVERNMENT FOR ONCE, HUH?!"**

"You've never cared about that," Cable says, still calm as $^%& as he steps toward where Deadpool is held helpless in the air. "You just want the license to fight superheroes."

 **"** **Hey, that reminds me,"** Deadpool muses, demeanor changing from furious to thoughtful in a fraction of a second, **"does Hawkeye need to register? Cuz he really doesn't** ** _have_** **any superpowers..."**

Maybe the mood change would disconcert someone else, but not Cable. He's too used to Deadpool.

"You just want to be on the side that gets the most fighting," Cable continues, as if he actually knows &^%$.

 **"** **So what if I do?!"** Deadpool demands, furious again as he glares down at the half-living-metal man. **"So why don't you let me down so we can** ** _fight_** **then, huh? Without you cheating by using your fake telekenesis and telepathy stuff."**

"No, I need to talk to you," Cable says seriously, and geez, why has nobody ever told him that he looks constipated when he's serious? "Joining the rebel cause will be a better fighting deal. Not only will you get to fight against supers like Iron Man and Captain Marvel, but you'll be able to fight against any government soldiers sent after the rebels. And trust me, there will be a lot of government soldiers licensed to hunt the rebels down."

 **"** **WELL MAYBE I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT AGAINST ANY OF THEM!"** Deadpool shouts angrily, trying desperately to kick out at the silver-haired, self-proclaimed Savior of the World. **"MAYBE I JUST WANT TO FIGHT AGAINST** _ **YOU!"**_

Cable stills. "Is that so?" he asks after a moment, tone still calm and even as he pins Deadpool's gaze with his own. "And why would that be?"

 **"** **Why would—?"** Deadpool splutters, his mouth gaping behind the red and black mask. **"BECAUSE YOU'RE A SELF-RIGHTEOUS %$^ & # *%$ AND I'M ****_NOT YOUR PET PSYCHO KILLER!_** **THAT'S WHY!"**

(The other assembled rebel superheroes, who'd been all but forgotten by the Cable and Deadpool, (glance at each other, then back at the scene before them.

("This seems rather... personal," Daredevil remarks.

("Perhaps we should leave them to it," Captain America suggests.

("Aye," Hercules agrees.

(As quietly as possible, they exit the room.)

Meanwhile, said two figures who are currently making a scene don't notice any of that, because they're too busy staring at each other.

Well, 'staring' is perhaps the wrong word—Deadpool is definitely _glaring,_ while Cable actually has the gall to look _hurt._

Deadpool is still ranting. **"Just because we're** ** _best buds_** **whenever you need somebody to do your dirty work or to make a fool of and you dismiss me like trash the rest of the time does** ** _not_** **mean that we always have to agree or that I'm attached to you like a baby to its mother's teat! So you can take your % #$^* leash and** ** _choke collar_** **and shove them up your $$!"**

And now Cable looks both hurt _and_ guilty. The #*^$. And damn this stupid comic-book censoring.

"Wade..." Nate says quietly. "You know I don't think of you like that."

 **"** **Yeah?!"** Deadpool demands, livid. **"Well, everybody** ** _else_** **does! I'm a full-grown adult, you know! I can make my own # &$%*^# decisions, and if I want to sign up with the government to kick your and every other unregistered super's $$%# then I have a right to do that!" **

"Please," Cable says, somehow managing a confused-and-hurt-puppy-dog-face, despite having white hair because he's actually like super old (or at least, he's _somewhere_ between 30 and 50, who really knows with continuity especially when people don't age, not even hot old guys like Cable and Magne-effing-to) and somehow is buff as a ^$#%&# Asgardian god. "You could do so much more by my side."

 **"** ** _SEE?!"_** Deadpool shrieks at him. **"THAT IS** ** _EXACTLY_** **WHAT I MEAN! People either hate me and want to kill me or else they want to** ** _control me,_** **and you fall in Category #2! And that's the** ** _thing_** **with you, Nate!"** Deadpool continues, before Cable can do more than open his mouth in a vain attempt to say _something._ **"I** ** _know_** **why I don't have any actual friends! It's because I'm a #$% ^ & #*%$ who kills people I don't like or that I'm hired to, annoy the hell out of anybody I don't kill, and treat all my allies like #$% . You want to know why ****_you_** **don't have any friends?"**

He doesn't even give Cable a chance to reply before yelling, **"IT'S CUZ YOU NEED TO CONTROL EVERY-#$% &^# -ONE AND EVERY-#$%&^# -THING!"**

There's a _THUMP!_ as the the gravimetric field surrounding Deadpool disappears and he drops to the floor.

"Somebody has to," Cable says quietly, looking at Deadpool with an unreadable expression as the mercenary springs up to his feet, glaring at him. "The people of this world need a leader. Somebody has to step up to the job. Somebody has to point them in the right direction, has to give up everything for the future."

 **"** **And somebody has to play the manipulatable idiot,"** Deadpool grinds out, fists clenched at his sides as he glares at the time-traveler from the future. **"But I'm sick and** ** _tired_** **of it, Nathan # &*%^$ Priscilla Summers."**

Cable holds his gaze, both eyes blue and un-glowy. "So what now?" Cable asks, voice uncharacteristically quiet, muscles tenser than Hawkeye's bowstring. "Do you still want to fight me? Because if it's a fight you so badly want, it's a fight I'll give you."

Deadpool stares at him, face unreadable behind the expressionless mask. **"Me? I'm going to go back to my apartment and watch TV twenty-four-seven until my brain rots. You? You're going to keep trying to save the world, no matter how much it doesn't want to be saved."**

Deadpool turns and starts striding out of the warehouse. **"Good luck, Priscilla. You're sure gonna need it. Even** ** _I_** **can tell it's a long, lonely road you're headin' down."**

Cable stood there silently for longer than necessary after Deadpool left, staring at nothing.

* * *

"What happened to Deadpool?" Captain America asks Cable later, somewhat cautiously.

"He went home," Cable intoneswithout emotion, keeping his gaze fixed on the table, where the rebels have spread out their plans of resistance.

Captain America frowns slightly. "So which side is he on?"

"Neither," Cable says tonelessly.

"Are we going to have to worry about him?" Captain America presses.

"Only if you attack him first," Cable answers. "So don't attack him."

Captain America looks at the savior with concern. "Is everything alright, Cable?"

"Yes," Cable says immediately, his left eye flashing blue as he scans the revel plans, already planning on how to get Deadpool back firmly on his side by manipulating the US government into going after the mercenary.

* * *

 **AN: We finally get to the Cablepool next chapter ;)**


	3. You Don't Know Anything About Me

_**AN:**_ **This chapter is very similar to the last, except that Wade loves Nathan. I'm afraid, even though the first part of the chapter is pretty similar to last chapter, you still have to read through it, because some things are added and/or changed ;P**

 _I don't know why I really, really enjoy rewriting scenes differently, but I really, really do. And I haven't seen anybody else who does that - not saying that nobody else does it, just that I haven't seen it - but whatever, right?_

* * *

 **You Don't Know Anything About Me (and you don't know that I love you)**

_**Oh, this is SO MUCH FUN!**_ Deadpool thinks as he fires tranquilizer darts at Captain America again, and the good ol' Cap'n blocks them with his mighty red-white-and-blue shield of freedom and rescued kittens.

"Hercules can hit him a few times," comes an oh-too-familiar voice, calm and self-assured and sex as $%^&. "Deadpool has a healing factor."

As if they all didn't already know that.

"He'll recover. Eventually," Cable, aka Nathan Dayspring Askansi'son Gesundheit, says, stepping out into the room all glowing blue—no seriously, his left eye flashing blue, and a blue aura around him illuminating his huge, toned muscles, as he comes to save them from the madman called Deadpool. _Way to make a dramatic appearance, Nate. Just like always._

Soldier from the future here to save the world from its own— _and his own—_ _ **insanity.**_

 _And currently here to save me from mine,_ Deadpool thinks, and rather bitterly. _Or so he believes. The #$ &%$ who's too damn sexy for his own &%^$# shirt. And pants. The pants, too. _

"Looks like we're on different sides of the fence here," Nate says, approaching Deadpool with sure strides. Though please notice how he never once lets down his gravimetric force-field whatsit thingie. "I'll _double_ whatever the Commission on Superhuman Activities is paying you."

 **"** **My principles cannot be bought!"** Deadpool says indignantly, cuz Nate soon-to-be-sainted, sexy Savior of the World Cable thinks that he knows Deadpool _so_ well, when he doesn't even know Deadpool's feelings for him.

"And I'll give you a bigger badge," Cable adds. He keeps his gaze steady on Deadpool, not blinking, and it's all Deadpool can do to suppress a shiver, because just _damn_. Those were eyes that could look right through you into your head, even though they couldn't anymore, and they never could see into Deadpool's.

Really, though? Cable thinks a _badge_ would get him to switch sides, when what he _actually_ wants is something that Nate _can't_ give?

 **"** _ **Oooooh! Can't/must conflict...!"**_ Deadpool drawls out, as if he's really thinking about it.

Then he whips out his gun (which is currently loaded with tranquilizer darts, unfortunately—cupid love arrows would be better) and fires at Cable, even though he hasn't let down his gravimetric-whatsit-shield-whatever, because if Cable knows anything about Deadpool, it's that he gets violent when he's angry, and you never, _ever_ let down your guard around a violent, angry Deadpool.

 **"** **NO!"** Deadpool yells as he fires, because even though it's not really doing anything, he likes the _PFFT_ sound the projectiles make as they hit Nate's forcefield, and the weapon-firing gets his anger across pretty well. **"NO! NOT EVEN MORE A BIGGER BADGE COULD I BETRAY MY** _ **UNCLE SAM!"**_

He kinda hopes Nate will actually believe he's a patriotic idiot, and that this isn't actually just all about how angry Deadpool is with _Cable,_ and what he maybe feels for him that might be a bit stronger than friendship.

And he doesn't want to get hit by the tranquilizer darts and fall unconscious because he and Nate _aren't done with this yet,_ and hey, maybe Cable's glowy blue pseudo-telekenesis shield doesn't encases him for the full 360 degrees, so Deadpool runs in a circle around him as he fires.

"Wade," Cable says, in that patronizing tone of his, "you're not a patriot."

 **"** **HOW DO YOU KNOW I'M NOT?!"** Deadpool demands, because really, Cable probably knows more about _every single other # &%$ person on the planet _than he knows about Deadpool, since Deadpool's mind is the only one he's never read (patching the holes and preventing more from happening was not actually _reading_ Deadpool's mind).

Sometimes Deadpool wonders: if Nate had ever been able to read his mind, would he keep coming back for him like this? Or would he hate Wade just as much as everybody else, and find a way to kill him? (Because if anybody could find a way, it would probably be Nate. &%$^, he was practically killing Wade with a broken heart as it was...)

"You're not even American," Cable continues calmly, letting the mercenary continue to fire bullets at him, not even turning to try and keep him within view. "You're Canadian."

 **"** **SO?!"** Deadpool demands. He runs out of bullets, so he just chucks the gun at Nate. He would have hit him right in the nose, too, if Nate didn't have the forcefield thing going on for him. **"Maybe I** ** _agree_** **with the superhero registration act! I don't have a secret identity, after all!"** It's so easy to use that as an excuse for his anger. Now if only Nate would buy it...

"I don't have a secret identity, either," Cable points out calmly, and Deadpool really wants to hit him. If only that glowing blue energy shield wasn't in the way...

"And I know you don't actually care about the Superhero Registration Act," Cable continues, and _damn it,_ Nate is too smart for his own good, and if he sees through Wade's excuses then who's to say he won't eventually make his way to the _truth?_

 **"** **NO, YOU** ** _DON'T_** **KNOW THAT!"** Deadpool yells, and #$^% it, when has Nate's stupid telekenitic abilities ever stopped Deadpool from trying to attack him? So he throws himself at Cable, fists flying, but he isn't even able to connect with the glowing blue barrier before it's encasing him and holding him up in the air, immobilizing him, and maybe that kind of telekentic bondage thing would be fun in bed, but right now it's decidedly _not_ fun and is just _pissing Wade off_. **"MAYBE I JUST WANT TO BE ON THE THE RIGHT SIDE OF GOVERNMENT FOR ONCE, HUH?!"**

"You've never cared about that," Cable says, still calm as $^%& as he steps toward where Deadpool is held helpless in the air, and Wade should really _not_ find that as much of a turn-on as he does. "You just want the license to fight superheroes."

 **"** **Hey, that reminds me,"** Deadpool muses, forgetting about his anger for a moment as a thought occurs to him, **"does Hawkeye need to register? Cuz he really doesn't** ** _have_** **any superpowers..."**

Maybe the mood change would disconcert someone else, but not Cable. He's too used to Deadpool, and Wade doesn't know if he loves that or hates it.

"You just want to be on the side that gets the most fighting," Cable continues, as if he actually knows &^%$ about Deadpool and his oh-so-elusive-and-well-hidden feelings.

 **"** **So what if I do?!"** Deadpool demands, furious again as he glares down at the half-living-metal man who somehow manages to make saving the world look _sexy_. **"So why don't you let me down so we can** ** _fight_** **then, huh? Without you cheating by using your fake telekenesis and telepathy stuff."**

"No, I need to talk to you," Cable says, purposefully serious and accidentally really %&^$#% _hot_.

Wade might be drooling a little bit, so he hastily swallows. Good thing his suit makes it extremely difficult to get hard, and hides it even if he does.

"Joining the rebel cause will be a better fighting deal," Cable continues. "Not only will you get to fight against supers like Iron Man and Captain Marvel, but you'll be able to fight against any government soldiers sent after the rebels. And trust me, there will be a lot of government soldiers licensed to hunt the rebels down."

That might be a good approach, Nate, if it wasn't so incredibly, completely _not what Wade's $# %^* & problem is. _

**"** **WELL MAYBE I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT AGAINST ANY OF THEM!"** Deadpool shouts angrily, and the words: **"MAYBE I JUST WANT TO FIGHT AGAINST** ** _YOU!"_** comes spilling out before he can stop them.

Cable stills, and Wade thinks: _^% &*$# ! _And then curses this fanfiction for censoring all swearwords comic-style, because it's really annoying, and Wade wonders how the hell Nate hasn't noticed that all his cursing is getting bleeped out.

"Is that so?" Nate asks after a moment, tone still calm and even as he pins Deadpool's gaze with his own, and Wade wouldn't be able to look away even if he wanted to. Nate's eyes are so # $%^&* _blue,_ and look way younger than they should, after all the year's he's lived and all the things he's been through. "And why would that be?"

 **"** **Why would—?"** Deadpool splutters, his mouth gaping behind the red and black mask, because it's ridiculous how ^%$ &# _clueless_ Nate is when it comes to himself. **"BECAUSE YOU'RE A SELF-RIGHTEOUS %$^ & # *%$ AND I'M ****_NOT YOUR PET PSYCHO KILLER!_** **THAT'S WHY!"**

At this point, the other rebel superheroes leave to give them some privacy. Cable and Deadpool have both already forgotten about their existence, however, so they don't notice them leave, sending almost-pitying glances back at them.

Deadpool glares furiously at Cable _,_ while Cable actually has the gall to look _hurt,_ as if Wade could _hurt_ him and wasn't the one who was _actually hurting._

 **"** **Just because we're** ** _best buds_** **whenever you need somebody to do your dirty work or to make a fool of and you dismiss me like trash the rest of the time does** ** _not_** **mean that we always have to agree or that I'm attached to you like a baby to its mother's teat!"** Deadpool shouts, and it says a lot about how much Cable's gotten used to Wade that he doesn't so much as blink at that simile. **"So you can take your % #$^* leash and** ** _choke collar_** **and shove them up your $$!"**

And now Cable looks both hurt _and_ guilty. The #*^$. Even though he _should_ feel guilty, but he shouldn't *& #^%$ _pretend_ like he's guilty, because Wade knows that he's _not._

"Wade..." Nate says quietly. "You know I don't think of you like that."

 **"** **Yeah?!"** Deadpool demands, livid, because _oh yes Nate does he's said so out loud to Irene nobody pay attention to how Wade knows that when he really shouldn't be he does so shove it_. **"Well, everybody** ** _else_** **does! I'm a full-grown adult, you know! I can make my own # &$%*^# decisions, and if I want to sign up with the government to kick your and every other unregistered super's $$%# then I have a right to do that!" **

"Please," Cable says, somehow managing a confused-and-hurt-puppy-dog-face, despite having white hair because he's like super old (but he's aged pretty damn nicely) probably but somehow also is buff and sexy as a ^$#%&# Asgardian god. "You could do so much more by my side."

 **"** ** _SEE?!"_** Deadpool shrieks at him, furious, because Nate wants (to use) him but he doesn't actually _want him,_ not like Wade wants Nate. **"THAT IS** ** _EXACTLY_** **WHAT I MEAN! People either hate me and want to kill me or else they want to** ** _control me,_** **and you fall in Category #2! And that's the** ** _thing_** **with you, Nate!"** Deadpool continues, before Cable can do more than open his sexy mouth (that Wade is trying very hard to keep himself from staring at) in a vain attempt to say _something that Wade definitely doesn't care about._ **"I** ** _know_** **why I don't have any actual friends! It's because I'm a #$% ^ & #*%$ who kills people I don't like or that I'm hired to, annoy the hell out of anybody I don't kill, and treat all my allies like #$% . You want to know why ****_you_** **don't have any friends?"**

Cable looks like Wade just punched him in the face, but Wade keeps right on with: **"IT'S CUZ YOU NEED TO CONTROL EVERY-#$% &^# -ONE AND EVERY-#$%&^# -THING!"**

There's a _THUMP!_ as the the gravimetric field surrounding Deadpool disappears and he drops to the floor.

"Somebody has to," Cable says quietly, looking at Deadpool with an unreadable expression as the mercenary springs up to his feet, glaring at him.

Wade can't decide which he wants to do to that face more: punch it or kiss it. Maybe he could compromise and shoot it instead...

"The people of this world need a leader," Cable says, still in that soft, I-have-the-entire-$%# ^*&-world-on-my-shoulders voice. "Somebody has to step up to the job. Somebody has to point them in the right direction, has to give up everything for the future. And if what you say is the case... why did you believe in me?" Nate's face is one of need—a child begging for attention, for praise, for an affirmation.

Deadpool glances down. **"I still believe in you,"** he says. **"Or at least, I believe you could** ** _do_** **it—that you could save the world—if the world** ** _let_** **you. But I don't believe in the** ** _world_** **enough to think that it'll let you save it. And truth be told, Nate,"** he glances away from the taller, broader, older, sexier man, **"I don't** ** _want_** **you to succeed."**

When he glances up, Nate's expression looks pained.

 **"** **I don't want you to succeed because I can't** ** _live_** **in the kind of world that you're trying to create,"** Wade hisses, and the venom in his voice is scalding his throat. **"There's no** ** _place_** **for me in your peace-loving, granola-eating, violence-and-murder-free** _ **paradise."**_

"Wade—"Nate starts, but Wade quickly cuts him off.

 **"** **No, I** ** _don't,"_** Wade snaps, and it's probably a good thing that he's wearing the mask and Nate can't see all the... the _hatred_ and _anger_ and _fury_ on his face. **"I** ** _tried_** **to live that way, remember? I** ** _tried_** **to live on Providence—and we both saw how well** ** _that_** **worked out."**

Nate looks down, no doubt remembering how Wade killed that (supposedly) former terrorist for absolutely no apparent reason, other than that _he felt like it._ And if, after Nate restored his memory, Wade now remembers that he'd killed the terrorist because he was _still_ a terrorist and he was plotting against Nate and Providence and that Wade didn't want Nate to know so he'd destroyed all the evidence, well—Nate doesn't need to know all that. It's not like he'd believe it, anyway.

 **"** **I'm a violent, unstable** ** _murderer,"_** Deadpool points out harshly, because it's _true_ , no matter how much he might try to convince himself that he doesn't want to be that way (except that, secretly, deep down, that's just who he _is_ and it's _never_ going away, and as soon as Nate figures that out the better—there's no place for Wade in the wannabe-messiah's dreams). **"Even the brainwashing One World Church couldn't get rid of my urges to** ** _kill_** **and** _ **maim."**_

"Wade," Nate tries again, concern and hurt scrawled all over his handsomely rugged features, and he's so _virile_ and _male_ and he really _should not be Wade's type,_ because Wade likes hips and boobs, right? _(Right?)_

"I _know_ that you're actually a good person—" Nate tries, but Wade isn't having it. _He isn't # $%! & having it. _

**"** **No, you** ** _don't_** **know that!"** Wade practically screams, and in a fraction of a second he's slipped a knife out of his sleeve and has it pressed to Cable's neck, Cable shoved violently back against the warehouse wall. **"You** ** _can't see what's inside my head_** **and** ** _you_** _ **don't know anything about me!"**_

Nate doesn't know—Nate doesn't know what an awful, violent, #^%$&$-up, _ugly_ person Wade is on the inside (because if you think he's ugly on the outside?—which everyone does—he's so much _worse_ on the inside), and he doesn't know that Wade loves him—he doesn't know that Wade loves him so much that it _hurts_. Hurts worse than the Cancer-HealingFactor War going on inside him every second of every day, hurts more than what little conscience he has, hurts more than the screams and disgusted looks of most people who see his face.

And the _terrifying_ thing is that this isn't just lust—it's full on # !$%*# _love,_ the kind that Cable Savior-of-the-Earth Summers doesn't have _time_ for. Even _if_ there were somehow a chance for Nate to love him back, if it wasn't painfully obvious that Nate is as straight as Wade used to think that he was and that he has the hots for Domino, a relationship between them could never work, because Cable doesn't have any _time_ to pursue relationships between all his world-saving.

The best Wade might be able to get is a quick fuck every now and then, but that's not what Wade _wants._ A quick fuck would just make Wade feel even more dirty and pathetic and _used_ than he already feels when it comes to Nathan Gesundheit Priscilla Messiah Summers because Wade doesn't want to fuck around with him—he wants to _make love_ with him. The slow, deliberate kind, permeated with sappy love confessions and all that junk that Wade neither deserves nor needs but _wants_. And he can't even remember the last time he _wanted_ something like that.

He just wants to spend _time_ with Nate, time that Nate doesn't have. A disturbing amount of Deadpool's fantasies involve things like sunscreen massages, rather than just fucking, and are creepily non-violent and quite nearly _domestic,_ and it honest-to-a-God-that-either-doesn't-exist-or-doesn't-give-a-$#!% _scares_ the living $#!% out of Wade.

"I know some," Nate says, trying to keep an iron grip on whatever calm he can, because Wade's been silent for a total of about three seconds and doesn't seem to be opening his mouth to say anything else.

It takes Wade a moment to remember what they were even talking about, his mind had run off on such a tangent.

"I know that you don't actually like chimichangas, you just like the word," Nate says, and he's trying to hold Wade's gaze, but Wade's wearing the Deadpool mask and so Nate would never know whether Wade was actually looking at him or not, ha! "I know that for you, violence is akin to mediation. I know what you usually dream about," and that's actually not as creepy as it sounds, because Wade has this nasty habit of talking rather loudly in his sleep—he really only shuts up when he's _dead._ "I know that—"

 **"** _ **Shut! Up!"**_ Deadpool hisses, putting just enough pressure on the knife that he'd temporarily forgotten he was holding against Nate's neck to nick the surface of his skin, a single, solitary drop of blood trickling down the tanned flesh.

"Wade..." Nate whispers, staring at him unblinkingly, unflinchingly.

 **"** ** _I said SHUT UP!"_** Deadpool shouts. Only suddenly he realizes that he's leaning into Nate's face, and that Nate's deep blue eyes are slightly widened in surprise, his lips slightly parted, and Wade has never wanted to kiss those lips more than he does now.

And Wade's never had the best impulse control, and he realizes, somewhere, in darkest corners of his shallow heart or deeply buried in the disturbing junk that fills his brain, that this might be his only chance to do this.

So he stands up on his toes and leans forward, pressing his mask-covered lips to Nate's, and he doesn't close his eyes because he wants to see Nate's expression of disgust, only Nate doesn't look disgusted, only surprised, and Wade thinks it's definitely a good thing that he's kissing Nate through his mask.

The knife is still pressed to Nate's throat with one of Deadpool's hands, while the other reaches for a grenade on his belt, fumbling to pull out the pin.

And then Wade is suddenly lowering the knife and pulling back, and Nate looks all adorably ( _adorably?_ really? how the hell does he _manage_ that?) confused and he's about to say something, only then his blue, blue eyes alight on the pinless grenade in Wade's hand, and Cable barely has time to throw a gravimetric shield over himself before the grenade goes off in a fantastic burst of white and yellow and orange and _red._

Once the explosion dissipates, Nate drops the shield and looks around to see that the area is painted red with Wade's remains.

And Nathan Dayspring Askansi'son Summers, who's seen all kinds of horrific battles and carnage imaginable, feels incredibly, inexplicably _sick._

* * *

When Cable catches up with the rest of the superhero rebels, his face is cut out of stone.

"Cable," Captain America greets. "What happened with Deadpool?"

Cable doesn't answer. He doesn't even appear to have heard the good captain.

"Come on," Cable says, easily stepping forward to take the lead, to show the way. "We have a mission to complete."

* * *

When Wade's heart starts beating again and his brown eyes reopen, he's lying naked on the cold, concrete warehouse floor, wishing, not for the first time, that he could have just $#%^&!* stayed dead.

* * *

 **AN: Honestly, that got a whole lot angstier than I thought it would...**

 **Okay seriously though, is there anyone out there on this site that has read the _Deadpool & Cable _series? **


End file.
